We don’t stay where we aren’t wanted. We don’t remain happy in a job that gives us no staying opportunities. We may remain there for financial gain, but we slowly die in stagnation. The same can be said for all relationships.

Without reasons to stay, our brain no longer functions the way it is designed to because we don’t get to properly exercise it when we are bored. We feel no emotion, we feel no attachment, and we feel worthless. If we stay, we doubt our ability to reason and we don’t look at the world around us. We don’t understand how others have more than ourselves. We wonder what makes us stay. Yet, we don’t question the actual behavior that we continue to choose each day.

What causes us to stay? Is it fear or love of the job or relationship? Fear cripples us so that we no longer function naturally. Love propels us to do great things. Do you see a few who seem happy at work? Why are they happy? Are they really happy?

What brings happiness? Think about the toddler and that huge smile. That smile is usually associated with conquering a new challenge on that unending quest for more knowledge. A quest to find a sense of accomplishment (a sense only created by the toddler) as no one else can move those legs to scoot, crawl, walk, and then run. Staying power came from the desire to learn and to see whatever was out of reach.

When is the last time you reached for something that you wanted? Has it been years? Why did you quit reaching?

When you met that someone special you had to reach a point of confidence to: ask for a dance; a date; and perhaps another date to tie-the-knot. Then, did you perhaps quit reaching because you felt you had staying power? Did you do the same in your job?

Staying power can mean many things, but, we are all happier when we are reaching out to make life better than it was when we woke up. Could it be time to wake up and start reaching new levels of learning again?

Today, ask questions of a boss, or fellow employee, who has a job you’d like. You will be surprised how much they will share with you. Ask so you can learn and grow. Later we will see how this new learning and happiness will affect every relationship.